Dependable Renegade

Speaking of people who should

have dropped from a heart attack a loooong time ago, let's talk about Paula "DiaCletus" Deen:

Last month, Food Network chef Paula Deen gave a videotaped deposition as part of a discrimination suit she’s facing in which she discussed her desire to have a “very southern style wedding” for her brother modeled after a restaurant where the “whole entire wait staff was middle-aged black men” clad in white jackets and black bow ties, according to a transcript of the deposition filed in federal court in Georgia. Deen also admitted to having used the N word and discussed the ways the word could be “not said in a mean way.”

...

“Well what I would really like is a bunch of little niggers to wear long-sleeve white shirts, black shorts and black bow ties, you know in the Shirley Temple days, they used to tap dance around,” the lawsuit claims Deen said. “Now that would be a true southern wedding, wouldn’t it? But we can’t do that because the media would be on me about that.”

Keep fucking that butterstick, Paula.

--WT

And yet, Dick Cheney is still alive.

R.I.P. James Gandolfini. 

--WT

Happy Hour News Briefs

News straight-up

Rev. Fishstickss says that conservatives are born that way. Eiron, the discoverer of Irony laughed so hard she farted.

• please, Please, PLEASE! - McCarthy-lite one-term former congressman Allen West has not ruled out running against Cuban-heritage fabulist Marco Rubio for senate in 2016. (Tigerbeat on the Potomac)
• All Jeebus' children - The ghost of Jerry Falwell is smiling, somewhere (and I am, too):

  "Liberty University’s law school is asking a federal judge to force the school’s insurance company to come to its defense as it fights a federal racketeering lawsuit involving the alleged kidnapping of a 10-year-old girl in the midst of a same-sex-marriage custody battle."

  (The VLW Blog)

• Whoopsie - Alan Chambers, the head of Exodus International, a group that has long backed “change therapy” for gays and lesbians, issued an apology:

  "...Please know that I am deeply sorry. I am sorry for the pain and hurt many of you have experienced. I am sorry that some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt you felt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents. I am sorry that there were times I didn’t stand up to people publicly “on my side” who called you names like sodomite—or worse. I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know. I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him that I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart. I am sorry that I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine."

  (BuzzFeed)

--Tengrain

News Briefs

News you can use all day

(Petunia and Pals) The Couch of Dumb wonders why The Kenyan Usurper would negotiate with terrorists (and they are talking about the Taliban, not the GOP).

• The Luntzian Candidate - Bush crime family macrocephalic freak show exhibit Not Chimpy says that it should not be that big a deal for Wingnuttia to fool the youngsters, women, gays, and people of color into feeling welcome into their ever-smaller tent:

  "My general thought is that the focus ought to be on how you get fifty plus one, not how you win amongst forty-five. And that’s kind of where we are where everybody has a view that’s slightly different than one another and certainly social conservatives are a huge part of a winning coalition, which means that we have to change our language to be inclusive but not abandon principle. That’s not as hard, I think, as people make it out to be."

  (Think Progress)

• Voter Fraud Found! - Is anyone surprised that there was massive voter fraud found in Virginia and it was by a single Wingnut trying to qualify staff-banging serial adulterer Newticles for the ballot there for 2012 Goat Rodeo:

  Prosecutors said Adam Ward, 28, collected more than 11,000 signatures in December 2011 to get Newt Gingrich's name on the Virginia presidential primary ballot. Investigators were unable to verify 4,000 of those signatures.

  (TPM)

• Separation of Church and State - Our mostest favoritist theocratic fetus fondler Rep. Jim Bridenstine (R-Old Testament) tells us that those effected by abortion could be healed by the power of Jeebus:

  “The good news is that for those who have been effected by the pain of abortion, there is one who chose, who made a real choice, to endure pain on behalf of of all of us, and by his stripes we are healed,” he concluded, referencing Jesus. “Mr. Speaker, as members of Congress, let us remember that even though we may not be able to hear their cries, we are not absolved from the guilt of ignoring their pain.”

  The Pain Capable Unborn Child Protection Act passed, by the way, following such inspiring stories as the revelation of fetus fapping. (Raw Story)

--Tengrain

Happy Hour News Briefs

News on the rocks

Get off the cross, "Dr. Chaps" (!!!) Gordon Klingenschmitt. Someone needs the wood.

• Racist harpy Phyllis Schlafly tells us that immigrants were Americanized when they voted for Ronald Reagan, and now they join gangs:

• Duggars, The Next Generation - Josh Duggar, the first of Daddy's 19 little squirts to exit the clown car, is now an Executive Director of the noted hate group The Family Research Council. (The Cloakroom)
• It's WAR - Yes, it is true according to Wingnuttia: all the recent rape revelations in the military is proof that there is a war on men. (Media Matters)

--Tengrain

I'm sold. Where do I sign?

Real estate description du jour.

 "Excellent finish and workmansheep"

--WT

I call dibs

on "Masturbating Fetuses" for a band name.

Representative Michael Burgess (R-TX) on Monday asserted that he witnessed male fetuses pleasuring themselves as early as 15-weeks after conception, RH Reality Check reported.

His comments came during a House Rules committee debate on the Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act, which would ban abortions nationwide after 20 weeks of pregnancy.

“This is a subject that I do know something about,” Burgess said, citing his experience as an OB/GYN. “There is no question in my mind that a baby at 20-weeks after conception can feel pain. The fact of the matter is, I argue with the chairman because I thought the date was far too late. We should be setting this at 15-weeks, 16-weeks.”

And THIS is why I see a liberal female OB-GYN.

[h/t twolf]

--WT

Blink!

Funny or Die: Bachmann Retires

 

--twolf

News Briefs

News you can use all day

(Petunia and Pals) Alaska's part-time governor and full-time grifter Mooselini makes her triumphant return on Fox News. And if this isn't an event horizon of stupidity, then what is?

• Full Disclosure - Many of the big, brand-name Silicon Valley Tech Giants are releasing information about the number of NSA requests that they have received:

  Facebook announced late Friday that it received between 9,000 and 10,000 requests from all levels of government in the U.S., from local law enforcement to classified national security requests, in the second half of 2012 alone. Microsoft said Friday that it received between 6,000 and 7,000 requests from all levels of government in that same time period, while Apple disclosed in a statement late Sunday that it received between 4,000 and 5,000 requests from U.S. law enforcement from December 2012 through May 2013.

  (TPM)

• Ratings - Not that it matters as there is no future re-election to worry him, but President Carebear's ratings have dropped sharply recently:

  A majority of 61 percent said they disapprove his handling of the government's surveillance while 49 percent said they consider the President honest and trustworthy, compared with 58 percent a month ago. Moreover, Obama's approval rating has plummeted 17 points in the last month among people under the age of 30, long one of his most reliable pockets of support.

  (TPM)

• Farewells - Long-time blogger Pam Spaulding is closing her eponymous blog, Pam's House Blend. She will be missed.

--Tengrain (it's a travel day today)

Happy Father's Day to

all you DR readers who have spawn...or fathers!

[h/t Elliott]

--WT

AWOL.

Hey, gang,

My apologies for the disappearing act - work has been uber-crazy for the past two weeks, and I'm engaged in a search for a new place to call "home" in this crazy town. It's been taking up all my thoughts and time. Shit always happens at once.

Anyway, it's all good, so once I get my head cleared, I'll be able to focus on the things that really matter -- like Rupert Murdoch's divorce and Sarah Palin's new/old job at FAUX GNUS.

In the interim, enjoy a lazy Caturday:

--WT

Happy Hour News Briefs

Drink up, bitchez!

NotChimpy explains to us that immigrants are more fertile.

• Won't you join the Family Research Council in praying for the Boy Scouts, the Supreme Court, and against Obamacare, Plan B, and well, just about everything else? (Family Research Council)
• Coach Dave wants to know whatever happened to Courage (Hint: the Cowardly Lion from Oz is involved)

• Ewww, Gross! - Cliff from Cheers wants one-term former Congressman Allan West (R-Satan's Hollow) to take “something from his gene pool” and “put it everywhere across this great country.” (Raw Story)

--Tengrain

News Briefs

News you can use all day

Let's celebrate the return of Mooselini to Fox News. Mediaite has some of her greatest hits up.

• Freedumb! - Noted Constitutional scholar and secessionist theocrat Texas Governor Rick Perry says that there is no guaranteed right to freedom from religion. What with it being in the first Amendment and all, one reasonably cannot expect him to have read that far. (Raw Story)
• GOP Rebranding Update - Poster Boy for GOP inclusiveness Marco Rubio says that firing people for their sexual orientation should be a right of employers. So, when do the firings of straight people begin? (Think Progress)
• Background checks - President Carebear has decided it is time to arm the Syrian rebels, which has absolutely 1,000% chance of success as Grandpa Walnuts will tell you that locating the good rebels vs the bad rebels is e-z p-z. (TPM)

--Tengrain

Happy Hour News Briefs

News with a twist

One-L promises us that we will never have another Republican preznint again.

• As Paul Lynde famously asked, What's the Matter With Kids Today? Plenty, seems to be the answer.
• We can now safely add serial check bouncer to satanic-yoga exorcst EW Jackson's resume.
• What did you do today, Todd Bentley? "Oh, you know, just the usual. Faith-healed a Ugandan woman to grow a new breast, levitated a boy."

--Tengrain

Yeah, pretty much.

From the China Daily, of all places:

[h/t Elliott]

--WT