Chairiots of Liar (updated)

^{--click to embiggen--}

Just like Snow Snooki, Paul Ryan loves to run, and apparently, he loves to lie too.

Ryan told Hugh Hewitt that he ran a sub 3:00 marathon -- "under three, high twos. I had a two hour and fifty-something," he said.

Funny thing is that Runner's World can't find any record of Ryan's super-fast marathon running.

"Ryan's name does not show up in the 1991 race results provided by Grandma's. Runner's World checked 11 years of results for Grandma's Marathon, from 1988 through 1998, and found a finisher in the 1990 race by the name of Paul D. Ryan, 20, of Minneapolis.

Ryan's middle name is Davis, and he was 20 in 1990. The finishing time listed was 4 hours, 1 minute and 25 seconds."

Oh what a tangled web we weave...

UPDATE: The Ryan camp has issued a statement (also noted by karen marie in the comments) from Lyin' Ryan:

"The race was more than 20 years ago, but my brother Tobin—who ran Boston last year—reminds me that he is the owner of the fastest marathon in the family and has never himself ran a sub-three. If I were to do any rounding, it would certainly be to four hours, not three. He gave me a good ribbing over this at dinner tonight."

Oh ha ha ha! What a ribbing I got! I WAS JOKING!

--twolf

Comments

[Larkspur]

I've read some reactions saying that this is dumb stuff that we shouldn't make a thing over because it lowers the discourse blah blah blah and I have to disagree with them. It doesn't disqualify someone from public office, obviously. But jeebus, talk about your unforced errors.... Stuff like this isn't "gotcha" journalism. Why on earth lie about your marathon time, except to be a dick? The vast majority of Americans are going to give you credit for running one and finishing it.

I used to know a guy who was a very good runner. He'd finish marathons right around the times the fastest elite women ran, and that's pretty damn good. Yet he still enjoyed meeting the rest of us for weekend training runs, even though most of us were way slower. We'd figure out extra loops for him to run, or sometimes he'd run ahead and double back. But it wasn't a big deal. (Luckily his wife was a very fast runner, so if they really wanted to get some interval training or fast distances, they could run together.)

He wasn't so fond of running with other men, in general, because he said that one of two things always happened: either they'd wildly oversell their own abilities and they'd have to drop out early, or they would simply be unable to do a training run - they'd always force it into a heated competition. My friend thought it was tiresomely dickish of them. I don't reckon he'd have liked running with Ryan.

[karen marie]

He lied.

Ryan told the lie last week but when a journalist caught up with him after having found the only record of Ryan running a marathon he said, "The race was more than 20 years ago, but my brother Tobin—who ran Boston last year—reminds me that he is the owner of the fastest marathon in the family and has never himself ran a sub-three. If I were to do any rounding, it would certainly be to four hours, not three. He gave me a good ribbing over this at dinner tonight.”

Yeah, he'd "round up to four." He ran a 4:01 in the Grandma’s Marathon in Duluth, Minnesota, in 1990.

Wouldn't you think you'd remember your time for the only marathon you'd run?

[montag]

Ah, but Ryan believed that he ran one in less than three hours, and that's what really counts, right?

And, if I say that I've teleported myself to the Vega star system and back, everyone should acknowledge that I have because I really believe it myself, yes?

I don't think the Founders ever anticipated that their very rational ideas would devolve into governance by wishful thinking, and yet, it has happened.

[jp]

Yes, Karen Marie, you would remember your time, if you were an runner, and especially since running a sub-3:00 marathon is an accomplishment that few not-professional racers can pull off. Had you actually done it, you would damn well remember, and if you had failed in that goal by an hour, you would remember that too. It may be some years since I failed (by 8 miles) to finish my first attempted cycling Century, but I won't forget that I fell just slightly short of my goal. (I have succeeded since, and I remember those rides too!)

I would bet Ryan has been telling that lie for years, through vanity and self-aggrandizement, and assuming no one would ever catch him out. It's a bit of self-glorifying mythology that adds to the macho-super-fit-elite persona he tries to cultivate.

Kind of like his claims to be a self-made man, when his father's Social Security benefits, and his family connections, did so much to smooth his path.

[karen marie]

Elsewhere someone suggested that he had been lying to his friends for years and repeated the lie to Hewitt to avoid having his friends say, "Hey, but didn't you say ..."

You would think that Ryan would consider national embarrassment to be a bigger issue given that he was already the selected VP and had to know everything coming out of his mouth would be verified.

Out of the field of pathological liars, Mitt Romney certainly did pick the right one. Ryan will apparently lie about literally everything. Somebody ask him what his favorite ice cream is and make him eat a gallon.

[montag]

"Somebody ask him what his favorite ice cream is and make him eat a gallon."

Uh, no. Wait for him to claim that shit is ice cream, and then make him eat a gallon.

[jp]

Just thought of another one: his "Oh, was that ME who asked Pres Obama for stimulus funds for my state like 4 times, after blasting the evil commie socialism of the stimulus? My stars & garters, I just do not recall!"

Similar pattern, the "Oh, I just FORGOT!" on things that no one, plausibly, forgets.

[Brucehamill]

You didn't run that...

[pansypoo]

butbutbut he's so PRITTEE!

[Teddy Partridge]

If he'll lie about something so trivial -- and so verifiable -- what will he lie about that can't be checked?

[watertiger]

HA HA. I ran a faster marathon than he did!