News you can use all day
(Petunia and Pals) Together at last! The Other Dumb One and conspiracy theorist Texas Congressman Hughie, Screwy, and Louie Gohmert.
- Retreat! - Quitting grifter (no, the other one) Bennie-the-Rat goes into his pre-Easter spiritual retreat (supplies: a copy of Honcho, a case of Jergens, and the Vienna Boys Choir). Upon his return, if he sees his shadow we will have 6 more weeks of Lent. (Raw Story)
- Education! - Speaking of sex, in a futile act of defiance against their Xristian Xrazie co-workers, 32 congressional Dim-o-Crats have reintroduced legislation to “expand comprehensive sex education programs in schools and ensure that federal funds are spent on effective, age-appropriate, medically accurate programs.” Currently, only 12 states mandate that sexual health curricula must be medically accurate. Sweet Jeebus! (Think Progress)
- Marketing! - Boy exorcist and noted volcano scholar Bobby "Bubba" Jindal is giving another of his patented Don't Be Stupid speeches to his fellow Wingnuttians (as he prepares for the 2016 Goat Rodeo? Yes.):
“We must not become the party of austerity. We must become the party of (economic) growth,” Jindal said. “We have fallen into a trap of believing the world revolves around Washington.”
Meanwhile Jindal's measures to shift public education dollars to religious schools and to eliminate entirely income tax in Louisiana move along, because that's thinking outside of the box. (TPM)